Crowd Control Enthusiast T-Shirts

Reverse speech

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

"By labeling it, I control it."

The Epsom Derby - The Finishing Line

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

Mass Travel

At home - 'small and early' - refreshments.

'What a control freak!'

'It's your remote. Hold on to it. Don't let other people push your buttons.' The kind of help men go for.

'Marcy, Ted - so glad you could come! Let me direct you upstairs to the overflow room.'

"I am a control freak."

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

"All the world's gotta do is look at me once, and I'll tap dance until I die."

Justice for a heckler.

Back in the football stadium - without face masks and social distancing!

"I should have know he was a control freak when he seduced me in his signal box."

'The view is great, but sometimes you've got to hang out with the non-fliers.'

Noah's Ark gets a bit overcrowded.

"I like things to be done my way but by somebody else."

'That concludes my prepared remarks. I'll take questions that fit my prepared answers.'

Micromanager of the Year Award: 'No, you need to present the award from my left...and did you do the awards form 87F, 2012?...'

"I hope this isn't another one of your crazy bounce-me-off-the-wall ideas."

"I have no problem with dictatorships; my problem is with not being the dictator."

Man asking for a job keeping order on polling day

Stadium usher of the month.

"My mom was a helicopter parent growing up and now she's become a B52 since I started working."

"We moved to the sea to get away from the crowd, only to find they'd moved to the sea."

I want you to make it so my eyes follow everybody around the boardroom.

'These new electronic tags are fantastic, they really make it possible for managers to keep track.'

'Hey! This isn't a sold-out crowd! It's just a bunch of cartoon humps symbolizing a sold-out crowd!'

'How long have you had this need to be in control?'

'How long have you had this need to be in control?'

'Actually, the guy I was chasing got away. But thanks for pulling over - you're better than nothing.'

'Well, I think I've finally gotten a handle on Jim!'

Businessman as God