Crowd Control Aficionado T-Shirts

'It's great for crowd control on walkabouts'

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

Crowded Ice Fishing

"By labeling it, I control it."

The Epsom Derby - The Finishing Line

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

Mass Travel

At home - 'small and early' - refreshments.

'What a control freak!'

'It's your remote. Hold on to it. Don't let other people push your buttons.' The kind of help men go for.

"It's great things are back to normal, except that there are people everywhere."

"All the world's gotta do is look at me once, and I'll tap dance until I die."

Justice for a heckler.

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

"I am a control freak."

Novel airport noise abatement procedures.

Man with Stop Signs.

'The view is great, but sometimes you've got to hang out with the non-fliers.'

Noah's Ark gets a bit overcrowded.

"I should have know he was a control freak when he seduced me in his signal box."

"I like things to be done my way but by somebody else."

'That concludes my prepared remarks. I'll take questions that fit my prepared answers.'

'I tell you, the guy's a total control freak!'

Stadium usher of the month.

We moved to the sea to get away from the crowd, only to find they'd moved to the sea.

"I hope this isn't another one of your crazy bounce-me-off-the-wall ideas."

"I have no problem with dictatorships; my problem is with not being the dictator."

"Gah! Too many people!"

"My mom was a helicopter parent growing up and now she's become a B52 since I started working."

'Hey! This isn't a sold-out crowd! It's just a bunch of cartoon humps symbolizing a sold-out crowd!'

I want you to make it so my eyes follow everybody around the boardroom.

Man asking for a job keeping order on polling day

"We moved to the sea to get away from the crowd, only to find they'd moved to the sea."

'How long have you had this need to be in control?'

'How long have you had this need to be in control?'