Criminal Minds Aficionado Gifts

Change of crime for a bored criminal

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

The Elliot Ness monster.

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

The Ballad of the Lavender Dot - Part Three

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

The Investigation

'Make it look like an accident.'

Ancient Egyptian crime scenes.

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

'Sure we've got a lot of anger. We also got a lot cement.'

"I almost got away with it! Then somebody called in the SWAT team!"

Fake Counterfeit Money

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

Arrest of La Tuta

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

"Your Honor, I wish to introduce as Exhibit A this bullet with the victim's name on it."

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

The Mousetrap, by Agatha Christie

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

"Any clues?"

'Emotional blackmail.'

'Same tragic story...A disgruntled athletic trainer burst into the locker room and starts taping players at random...'

Cufflinks + Handcuffs = Embezzlement

'Gee... Nothing says 'I'm dead' like a severed head.'

"He was a top boy - he could light up a room just by setting fire to it."