Crime Story Critic Pillows

'Why is it always about me?'

'Forget about Kilroy — the trail is cold.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"Puss in cement boots"

Cat Burglar

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

The Philip Marlow family

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

The evidence destroyed

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'