Crime Scene Aficionado Gifts

"I take it this is your first day as a scene of crimes officer?"

'Now this is home just went on the market this morning.'

"The killer had to be a man. Not only is the knife still bloody—it wasn't even put in the sink."

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'

"You realize, I guess, that you've left your DNA on that."

'Jimmy. Stick to the outline.'

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Crime

'Dont worry; that's not a ketchup stain. It's just blood.'

Everybody made fun of Josh for being afraid of his shadow, but later that day, they would all be sorry.

Here Lies John Doe

"What do we think Sarge, suicide?"

'Do you see the person who assaulted you?'

Frosty Had It Coming, See?

"Do your worst, Copper! I ain't no squealer!"

Detective questions woman with body in hat.

'You're not a very good listener, are you?'

Handprint Clue

'I'm not so sure that the intruder broke IN, sergeant. Look, there's snow on the outside of the igloo...'

Spread out boys, whoever did this couldn't have gotten far!

Duck or Grouse

Hanging Mime - Such a waste of talent.

'It appears that he was given payback by his trophies.'

'Put the blowtorch down, and walk away...'

He became suspicious after noticing the crime scene had been tidied up.

"It's not the first time this cartoonist has struck, Watson. I've seen this signature before."

'We've got all the time in the world, Repetto, so why don't we start with your childhood memories?'

"Forensics say it was the chandelier that got them."

"Just as I suspected, this man is obese."

"Here's his left foot."

" . . . the victim was slowly roasted until golden brown and then. . . Oh my gawd! Stuffed with bread and savory herbs and spices!"

"Another Game of Thrones O.D."

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

"Nobody leave this room."

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.