Crime Movie Aficionado Gifts

'My neighbors do a lot of backyard grilling.'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

The Elliot Ness monster.

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

Mobsters at the Beach

"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."

James Gandolfini in his driveway with a tablet

Mort Park! You mean Killer. You're sprung, Killer. I'm free to go? Unless you're so tough now you'd rather stay. I mean a guy named Killer probably likes jail. Mail me my blanky.

Block Closed for Gritty, Hard-Edged Tale

The Birthday Mafia Sends a message.

"I know your mother."

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

'Try to think of this as a learning experience.'

"I started to think outside the box. Then I started to think outside the law."

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

"I like his style. He makes it look like an accident."

"Don't worry, boss, he ain't gonna be takin' his shoes off on an airplane no more."

"Did you remember to whack the cat?"

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

"Remember - this meeting never happened, we never met, and you never wore that tie with that jacket."

Taking to the sky...

"You just said, ‘And then I killed my first and second husbands.’ ... Let's explore that."

"Rehearsal's off! Our first violinist was apprehended early this morning poaching clams in Great South Bay! The authorities have confiscated her rake and long tongs!"

'You can't arrest me -- I gave my power of attorney to another guy!'

"Stick 'em up!"

Make it look like an accident.

"I've come about the guitar lessons..."

"We have ways of making you talk."

'Don Francesco, scusi... But while we were burying Luigi, some joggers ran into us... So we had to bury five corpses altogether...'

"I've..er..come to read your meter..?"

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

'Luigi wants to know if you have considered consolidating all your existing debts into one manageable monthly payment?'

'In a surprise move today, the DEA arrested the CIA.'