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"You may want to check your pockets for another note."

'Hey, boss, I thought you said this heist was gonna be fool proof. . . so how do you explain this?!'

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

'Come on inspector, you call this fair?'

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

"Paper or plastic?"

Newton's Law and Order.

Ignorance of the Law

Gangster's To-Do List

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

A convict escaping during the press scrum

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

Handcuffs.

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

"Make it look like an accident"

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

Bank Robbery Statistics