Crime Lore Lovers T-Shirts

"You have been found guilty of rope theft". They survive, as the rope has been stolen.

"Puss in cement boots"

'All right pal, just hand over the nose and nobody gets hurt.'

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

Mafia Short-Term Memory Clinic. 'Fuhgettaboutit.'

"I'll never understand it. I followed the generally accepted principles of embezzling."

"Now don't do anything flashy with the money, like pay off all your student loans at once."

"Damn it—I told them I was too well known for undercover work!"

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

"Paper or plastic?"

"I couldn't finish that book either."

"Let's try it again. Hand over your wallet, and this time, don't try anything funny."

'Newgate - Exercise Yard'

Burglar escapes from tower using Rapunzel's hair.

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

"Make it look like an accident"

"It's a beautiful day except for the murders."

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

Handcuffs.

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

'Emotional blackmail.'

'Where was I on the night of the 7th of August? I was home washing my hair.'

Sketches by Boz - A Pickpocket Being Wheelbarrowed to Police Station

Fingerprint Show

'Before you buy the gun can I ask if you thought about taking your cat to the vets first?'

"And what do you see in this inkblot?"

"It's a wonderful story - starts with the murder of a butcher."

The Continuing Adventures of Mel Hufnagel, Corporate Head-Hunter...

'Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs record anything incriminating.'

Nice tie, Al - hand it over."

Witless protection prgram

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

Museum. So the thieves got past us with a few items, it's not like the stuff was new.