Crime Fan T-Shirts

"Wow, the iron maiden, the rack, thumb screws, flogging...can I have a go at all of them?"

Life on Earth - Burglear's doctor.

"Then after my accomplice cheated me, he died of natural causes." "I thought you killed him." "Naturally."

Batman at the Maternity Ward

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Cat Burglar

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'I hate frisking magicians!'

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

The evidence destroyed

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

"Take your time. Do you see the person who made you wear that dress?"

Crime in bookshop

'Careful, Mugsy, he's got a tool.'

'Hey, buddy -- can you keep a secret?'

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'