Crime Fan T-Shirts

"Wow, the iron maiden, the rack, thumb screws, flogging...can I have a go at all of them?"

Life on Earth - Burglear's doctor.

"Then after my accomplice cheated me, he died of natural causes." "I thought you killed him." "Naturally."

Batman at the Maternity Ward

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Cat Burglar

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

Minority Report

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

Whodunnit. Whoreallydunnit.

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'I hate frisking magicians!'

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

Miami Mice

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

'Careful, Mugsy, he's got a tool.'

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

"Take your time. Do you see the person who made you wear that dress?"

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."