Crime Comic Appreciator Pillows

Mou...Man trap!

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

New, Improved Cat

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

Self-Esteem Clinic.

"...and how long have you been a smoked Kipper Grader?"

"Do you want to order a contract killing, Don Carlos, or a pay-as-you-go killing?"

"Hmm. . . it looks like he was struck on the head with a blunt object. . . If only I could find out what the murder weapon could be. . ."

"I've got pride but no shame."

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

'Looks like we've got ourselves another cow jacking.'

'S**t!'

'It wasn't so much armed robbery as my client converting the owner's assets from sole proprietorship to a mutual fund.'

Well there's something you don't see every day...

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

Must you people always call during dinner? - Grim Reaper on the phone.

'I told you a blowgun was a bad idea!'

'Put the sword back in the stone right now, little girl, and we'll pretend this never happened.'

Shoplifter behind a barcode.

'I told you to be careful near my piercings, Gavin - they're not beer can ring pulls, you know!'

"Do we have any candy?"

'This is him, on the hands free.'

Bank robber to teller after robbery: 'Now, I'd like to talk to you about opening a savings account.'

Cartoon Gangsters - I'm gonna have to get Lumpy to rub you out!

Murder mystery bookshelf falls on passerby.

"It's the mark of Cain, but it's benign."

"May I focus my customer frustration on you with the understanding you're powerless and it's nothing personal?"

'I am here, because I killed two people while I was sleepwalking!'

'I am on a holiday from hell.'

...To tell the truth, I find them quite becoming.

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'