Crime Caper Enthusiast Gifts

"Audit him - but make it look like an accident."

"With these credit default swaps, I never know whose legs I'm supposed to break."

"Stockings and guns are allowed, but you can only claim a portion of your car. How often was it used to get away?"

'As Boss of this gang I'm in charge of Strategy; Fingers you head up Acquisitions; Tiny: Security; and Speedy: Transport. Leaving our intern Hugo, as Health & Safety Officer, to do the Risk Assessment.'

A bank robber robbing a bank with a gun on a chain like a pen

Big Bob knew it was wrong, but gosh darn it, someone had to stick up for the little guy.

"This branch has a time-lock safe which the staff are not intelligent enough to open."

'Let's go... ho do you spell 'Hold up'?'

"Louie, you apply for a loan while Rocco heads in through this door and files for bankruptcy."

'When you do get ahold of him, find out where all the money went.'

A daring day light bank robbery succeeded when the Widow Fipperwill, the gang leader, distracted a security guard.

"Yes, as a general rule, incorporation does limit one's personal liability. However, considering your line of business..."

Bank - 'It'll take me 3 days to pass this money through the window.'

'I'm afraid we aren't open to the public yet.'

'We got tired of running a mom and pop store.'

Joe's Wild Salmon

'Here's your chance to shine at tomb stoning!'

Mouse thieves.

"What I hate about these robberies is the 'Nylon Stocking Face' afterwards!"

The best laid plans...

'The Milkman of Alcatraz.'

'Can't we put this behind us and move on?'

'What are you trying to do...blow our cover?!! Take off that mask!'

Career criminal advisor.

'Did you make it look like a cover up?'

'The Bank - Hop in, we're going that way ourselves.'

"Psst.. your broom handle's showing."

'We've done it lads! We're finally through to the bank vault!'

'Didn't you get the money before locking them in the vault?'

Robber still desperately trying to crack a safe as they both fall from the roof

'Hon! I'm home from the bank!'

'MEXICO!'

WANTED The Strad Cad

'Not much cop,are you?"

"I didn't say it was your fault. . . I'm just sayin' that next time we should do a little more research!"