Crime And Punishment Analyst T-Shirts

"This is the part of the job I hate."

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

'See, Jimmy, as the population grows too dense, the rats begin to brutalize each other...'

Financial Corruption

Medellin erases the image of Escobar

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

New research on streetcrime

See no evidence, hear no evidence, speak no evidence.

Don't worry, we're anti gun control.

"Look,we'll settle this on penalties, not an American style shoot out."

"To the unsophisticated, I suppose, I'm guilty."

"Ah ha! Organised criminals..."

Please wait to be seated (by electric chair).

We are faced with a dilemma about why American social fabric is unravelling with such bewildering violence...fry a few people to make ourselves feel better about it!

QC appointments fall to all time low.

Ed's super-romantic but he's always a police detective. He calls our love 'consensual identity theft.'

Capital punishment right or wrong? For men or women?

"Thou shalt not kill. It's a sin. But people still commit murders, I'm happy to say. And the state kills the murderers...I'm twice as happy to say."

'You must have doubts because even I don't know if my client is innocent or guilty.'

"They all lead back to this ball of yarn."

Any shohplifters with a social conscience avoids small businesses.

"The business of crime DOES pay. It pays our salaries!"

"It's not a spike in crime, it's a spike in REPORTING crime that was there all along. So... that's better, right?"

Crime Prevention Seminar

'I'm a grandfather. How would you like it if someone mugged your grandfather.'

Plea Bargain Deals of the Rich and Famous

'When the Secretary of the Navy signed off with, 'Long live the Ayatollah', I knew we had been hacked.'

"I see the cuts are starting to bite."

Cats vs Murder Wall

'This is the Island of REAL misfit toys.'

The Forensic Statistician...