Credit Crunch Survivor Gifts

'Normally, I would give credit where credit is due but we're in a credit crunch. Therefore, I will take all the credit for your hard work on this project.'

'Great! Now I don't even have any walkin-around-bitchin'-about-not-having-any-money, money.'

'You have 14 creditors that won't get paid this month!' 'Fifteen, including yourself!'

'We've got to think about our lending policy for small businesses... Like my tailor!'

'Our cries of Armageddon were completely ignored, so let's just keep throwing money at the economy.'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

Wanna talk about it?

"Here, we realized it was not some awful fever dream."

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

"Phew! I'm glad this part of the ride is over..."

Eye, ear, nose, throat and loans to pay the bills.

"Financial Adviser advises client 'I advise you that you're broke'."

'Am I glad to be back - austerity's gone mad out there!'

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

"All in favor of changing out name from '17th Federal Savings & Loan' to 'Still Here Bank'..."

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

'This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up.'

'Remember you asked me to turn around the business!'

'I think that's enough enlightenment for now Tim!'

"Unfortunately, my holding on to tech-stocks was faith-based."

Moving. Mortgage payments bankrupted them. I guess "housebroken" means something different in their case.

Coming out of the crisis

Jetsgo out of business.

'If the market should go down really deep, I'll be well prepared!'

'You don't want to go to hell, J.B. In hell, the market is always down.'

'That concludes the list of students with outstanding grades. And now for those of you with outstanding student loan payments...'

''Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by'...which was a helluva dumb place for me to launch a burger franchise!'