Creative Technophile Gifts

Digital Canvas

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

"Grandpa, how did you ever survive without apps?"

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

'This book thing, Mum, where do I plug it in?'

The guy who took a wrong turn off the electronic superhighway and wound up in a microwave oven in Davenport, Iowa.

'An ebook! What are you reading?' 'Against technology: From the Luddites to neo-Luddism.'

"The record player is skipping again."

Computer Head

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

Copier is hypnotizing office worker.

The Line-up

"Careful how ya handle 'em Joe! They like to follow one another but they kin also turn nasty mighty quick!"

"I have no problem with A.I."

'Isn't that cute? - She has an imaginary Facebook friend!'

We're replacing you with a robot that also does nothing, but does it more efficiently.

'You're never alone when you've got a phone.'

"It's quite alright searching for the perfect phone. But remember there always will be upgrades."

"I was hoping it was one of those smart rakes that rakes the yard for mee..."

'He used to think, now he just googles everything.'

Man says 'It's time to embrace new technology', computer replies: 'I'm not hugging you until you get these sticky notes off me.'

New Year's Resolution.

"It's cash. It's kind of like a debit card."

'Broken down! Mr. Stephenson mend it sir, mend it, its not rocket science.'

'Uh-oh -- Bush found out about internet scams, and now he wants to invade Nigeria.'

"I couldn't call you right back. I'd just moisturized my hands and didn't want to sludge my screen."

Invention of the Toilet

"This is the politicians model, it doesn't actually give an answer."