Creation Story Fans Gifts

"I'm going on a diet. . . what foods do you think I should avoid?"

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"Shall we put it in play?"

Needless to say, God forgot the legs.

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

"Graveyards always put me ill at ease."

What? I had to fire our flare gun at him before he fired his flare gun at us!

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

Tree of Knowledge/Tree of Evolution

God's Phone

"Damn, I forgot to create the 'control-Z' command."

"In the beginning was the word. Bubba bubba bubba, bird bird bird, bird is the word."

Heavenly meetings.

The beginning of humans: A new theory.

Artificial intelligence trying to make it on its own.

Self raising Lazarus.

'I know you're doing your best, but I'm getting awfully tired of cream of coconut soup.'

"Guys, guys! Let's take this from the top. Who ordered the chicken nuggets...?"

"Now you've done it!"

God Choosing How to Shape the World

Mime Prison

'Man, am I hungover. Hope I haven't done anything stup... Hey, where did THAT come from?'

'Flying fish? - I TOLD you there was too much background radiation down there!'

"I'm taking it all with me. I created everything, and it's mine."

One Fine Tuesday in Antarctica

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

God creates Adam.

"Not only are we new here, I understand the whole place didn't exist a few days ago."

'Technically speaking, though, isn't Eve under age?'

'So, what did you decide - Flat earth or 3-D?'