Crafty Sailor Gifts

Row to Row

Captain in a storm

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

Beachcomber sees that smartphone displays 'message in a bottle.'

octopus knitting a jumper...

Sportknitting

A writer goes sailing.

'Because I don't want you to be part of the decision - making process, that's why!'

"Too long at sea, I'm afraid."

Sailor's pipe is a ship's funnel.

"Bloody GPS-plotter is going silly again!"

No Money

'Of course I know how to read the water, but I my glasses fell overboard.'

'Sam's not really a seafaring man but he can yo-ho-ho with the best of them.'

Hydrofoil wing boat.

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."

Cruise to nowhere

'Out anniversary was yesterday.'

UFO Romance

Sea song.

Franken-Cat

'O.K. let's see, it's a book, a film, it's two words...Could it be Robinson Crusoe again Graham?'

'I got tired of trying to get it into one of those tiny bottles.'

They were ALL texting.

"Sorry about your boat. Who do I see about personal injury compensation?"

'Sailing, it's a sport that doesn't float my boat.'

"Spinning, reefing, tacking...they sound like a dress making circle."

'If they sing row, row, row your boat one more time, I'm jumping ship!'

101 uses of a dead cat: life ring

"Look, if you must go down to the seas again, to the lonely seas and sky, then go!But take your BlackBerry."

"Oh, somebody might still want to buy it. I'll put it online as a listing."

Noah's Publisher: 'No, I'm not asking you to lie. I'm asking you to embellish the truth for the sake of marketing...'

'His heels are ruining this deck !'