Cozy Caffeinator Gifts

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

Reading the sports pages.

Cat Panels. Cats soak up sun on rooftop like solar panels.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Man, I could destroy a chocolate donut with sprinkles right now

'Being angry about shovelling snow will only make it harder for you, daddy...you need to just accept the snow...instead of thinking of it as a chore, you hate, make friends with it.'

'I take back everything I said about this sweater you knitted for me.'

'All this viewing is an endurance event in itself...'

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

"Love me?"

In the great green room there was a pot of coffee and a red-eyed dad, too. Good Morning Moon.

Book Igloo

'I like reading romance novels: They always leave me with a warm feeling inside...'

"Thing about human interest stories is, they always presume you're interested in humans."

Darlene? Rudy? I heard you might be hanging out here. I thought I'd come by just to say hello and see how you're doing. That's nice. Coffee King. I love you. Hence Coffee King. House of Java.

'How long has what been going on?'

Show Mom You Love Her!

'Care to gaze on the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

"Don't worry about being in your 40's - before you know it, you'll be in your 50's!"

A man opens his curtains to wake up his cats.

Dog in the Bed.

'I don't get out of bed for this kind of money.'

"Have you seen my onesie?"

"Which side do you want?"

"I could argue about foot and mouth until the cows come home."

E-Books.

'Finished! You see, I'm not slow at everything: I'm a great speed-reader...'

'All I want to know is--when do I get to use the quadratic formula, political facts of South America, frog anatomy, the ecology of Johnson Creek, and the billions of other things I spent twelve years studying so diligently?'

Melting Snow Trophies