Cowboy Humor Aficionado Gifts

Thirst.

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"You funnin' me, bub?"

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

"Head for the carrousel! It's our only chance!"

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

Cowboy uses his hat for a private kiss.

Draw!

"I dunno ... I get the feeling this is going to end very badly."

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

The Not So Wild West

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

Western Outfitters.

'Bunfight at the O.K corral.'

The Lawman

"Personally, I'd recommend something a little less formal for being run out of town."

"So long, Ma, I'm ridin' off into the sunset."

Tyrannosaurus Tex

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

'I haven't done anything. My ex-wife had those posters printed.'