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"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Billy. The Kid.

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

"Head for the carrousel! It's our only chance!"

"Waving the hat keeps the cattle moving and lets my hair get some highlights."

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"You funnin' me, bub?"

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

Cowboy uses his hat for a private kiss.

Draw!

Western Outfitters.

"I dunno ... I get the feeling this is going to end very badly."

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

The Not So Wild West

'Bunfight at the O.K corral.'

The Lawman

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

"Personally, I'd recommend something a little less formal for being run out of town."

'I haven't done anything. My ex-wife had those posters printed.'

Deep in the Heart of Texas: The Cholesterol Kid.

"So long, Ma, I'm ridin' off into the sunset."