Cow Wrangler Pillows

"I'm coming - I just need some 'me' time."

'It was just a matter of time, old cowpuncher, 'til one of them punched back.'

The Baby Walker

New Guy.

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

A trevor of trainspotters

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

"Mom, can you come get me?"

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

Parenting Business Deals

"Well, I've finished the project on time and on budget!" "That means I've given you too much time and too much money!"

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

The First Day Back

"You have reservations for 7 o'clock? Ideally..."

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

Quiet Time

Nanny with children on leash

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

"Are you sure they don't include children?"

The difference between cats and dogs.

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

'Fresh eggs!'

A kangaroo mother with a joey in her main pouch and a juice box in a separate smaller pouch.

"I work out of my house filled with kids and pets. My hobby is trying to keep sane."

'Let's go, Denmore. The free-range chickens are stampeding towards the canyon.'

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'