Covering Gifts

The AdRams Family no.2 - Computer cosy

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

Killer Executive Suits.

Remote control pirate bully

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Fear/Knowledge

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Eternal Student.

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.