Courtroom Role-player Gifts

May I ask what on earth made you decide to go into law? I used to try to get my girlfriends to act out a fantasy I had in which I would dress up as a lawyer and they would dress up as a judge and say things in Latin. But they all said it was too sick, so I decided to just go to law school.

Trial by Media

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

I love Lawyers

Barristers

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

'Your mom is probably watching. Go for the jugular.'

"Permission To Treat Prosecutor as Hostile, Your Honor?"

'The next case Your Honor, is a palimony suit. The ant vs the grasshopper.'

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"Boy is he good! He's even got me convinced you're guilty!"

Robert Macaire as a Solicitor

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."