Courtroom Communicator Gifts

'You use the former when wooing your beloved and the latter during negotiations with your divorce lawyers.'

'Before I pass sentence, have you anything to tweet?'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

Tell me a deposition, mommy.

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

'I got a suspended sentence.'

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

"Overruled."

'With my degree in law and in physics, I hope to create resonable doubt.'

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

'Brain surgery, right?'

'officially, I'm on leave, but I'm really just ducking the media.'

'... Yeah. That just means we aren't much good.'

"How was I supposed to know she was allergic?"

'I'll show you my fine print, if you show me yours.'

'What could I have done? The defence's motion was written on legal tender.'

'... And then Goldsmith here, said to him: 'Never mind, if you're innocent you have nothing to worry about'.'

Truth, justice and a damn good lawyer.

'I might be able to get you off if a chain of near miraculous rulings happen to occur.'

"You've been chewed up and spitout by some very prestigious firms."

Supine Court

"I've come to judge some books by their cover."

'On the other hand, if we accept confessions extracted under torture then soon they won't need lawyers.'

'That defense lawyer was really brilliant at jury selection...just ask the defendant!'

"You've come to the right lawyer. I not only do divorces, I also specialise in bankruptcy proceedings."

The firm took a Good Lawyed/Bad Lawyer approach to cases.

'Your honor, when considering sentencing please note that my client drove a hybrid car that gets 80 MPG.'

'According to my computer this is going to be expensive.'

"When I'm with you, Miss Lawson, the billable hours just fly by."

'Yeah, but look at the money we saved by your acting as your own attorney.'

'Sure, I've had a few run-ins with the law. But it wasn't all my fault. As a child I was once left … unsupervised.'

'Oh, lord! This is going to take FOREVER!'

"I interpret the death penalty according to the times."

'If you want a speedy trial, why do you keep objecting?'