Court Charmer Gifts

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'How about a game of cards?'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Planet of the Lawyers

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"Check out this new store."

You're the olive in my martini

Tennis ball girl.

"I say we move on to dessert."

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

Justice 4 Ron

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

Letter writing lady.

Basketball.

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'May I have the key to your heart?'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

"At least he's honest about it..."

'Watch what you admit to. He once tried to fine one of my clients for looking a gift horse in the mouth.'