Couple's Therapist T-Shirts

"What do you mean I never take you anywhere? We're here, aren't we?"

Credible evidence!

"But you say you don't like it when I repress my sexuality."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

Relationship Warning Lights

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

"It's a major fixer-upper. How's your marriage?"

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

Your Home Remodel Team

'While it's often said that laughter's a better medicine, I've learned that crying is best in solving disputes between husbands and wives.'

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

"I suppose we should start with listening skills!"

Duvet nailed to the floor.

"Arthur, I need my space."

"Now look, Frank, Molly, there's nothing wrong with a Polar Bear and a Penguin being in a relationship. In fact, in my experience, Polar opposites attract!"

Express Therapy

"See how controlling he is?!"

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

"He never sniffs my butt anymore."

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

A woman thinks of flowers and a man thinks of a prison cell.