Couple's Milestone Gifts

Cure for the wandering eye.

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

"You've changed."

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

Romance

Couples' therapy

Newlyweds. . . 10 Years Married. . . 25 Years Married. . . 50+ Years Married.

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Pearly King and Queen

"Happy anniversary, dear… 'happy wife, happy life!'" "That's because nothing rhymes with 'happy husband.'"

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

Sally and Joe's relationship really worked. . . they each had the space to do their own thing.

"I recommend that you two find a way to spice up your shelf life."

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

Woman crying with happiness.

'I think I have found Mr. Right.'

'Guess what? I won again.'

'If you really loved me you would have bought me flowers.'

Always Compatible

'Has Oprah ever been married?'

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

“I have to warn you - my parents are a bit old-fashioned.”