Couple Dynamics Explorer T-Shirts

"How come I never see that smile?"

"You realise you are drawing attention to us!"

"Sulk all you want Edward, we are not adding sporting equipment to our wedding registry!"

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

Incompatible.

"We hope seeing a marriage counselor maybe could make one of us less stubborn!"

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."

"I just love a nice knight out."

'It's true that my wife does forgive and forget - the trouble is that she never forgets what she's forgiven...'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"When I take your arm Charlene, there's no need to flex."

'But you have your own drawer - what greater display of commitment could you want?'

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

It would be hours before Jack realized that his wife was not being kinky but had, in fact, gone shopping.

"I think the banana looks like a mustache, or a weird smile or something. How about an apple? ... Just a suggestion."

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

"Happy anniversary, dear. How about a second honeymoon?" "Sure. Who with?"

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."

"He's all mine. Life is good."

'You were right. We should have gotten a lap dog.'

Sometimes in a relationship a person just needs some space.

The army and the church are in love with each other

"I'm a free woman. Edgar tried to cross the road."

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

'Dear, would it be all right if I was assertive for a minute?'

'But enough about me... let's talk about you. Do you prefer plain or ribbed condoms?'

Your numerous prescriptions really have improved my love life. I'm dating my pharmacist.

"It's the story of a woman who's driven to murder by her patronising, mealy-mouthed husband."

'Explain to me again how a trip to the mall to buy shoelaces resulted in this!'

Chick Magnet

Northern chat up lines: 'You don't sweat much for a fat lass'

"It's a new signal to specify that we don't need Robin."