Country Music Appreciator Gifts

'Will you stop playing Somewhere over the Rainbow?'

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

"Westminster's over, Shep-it's all about possums now."

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

'I took your advice and got a long little doggy.'

Cockerel sings the blues...

'Oh God I hope that bunch of rednecks aren't waving at me!'

"I'm putting you on country music."

Towny Music Night.

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

'I'll never forget the night I saw you across the crowded room of a dusty ol' honky tonk.'

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

Dear Farmer Brown - we really don't like you. The Animals.

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

"It's bad, Doc. the voices in my head are singing country western."

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

'The grass is always bluer to a banjo pickin bovine!'

Lawyers Ridin' The Range: 'Happy trials to you, until we meet again!'

Where the deer and the antelope play.

Bird Song.

St Bernard Toilet Holder

Cowpunk

The Invention of Country Music.

Impressive! (Cow has stinky smoke signals).

'This next song is called Reindeer farts in my face all night.'

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"I'd better get a hit country song out of growing up this way."