Country Life Comedian Pillows

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

Would you mind if I hung round your backside for a while?

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

"That was definitely mine."

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

The Mongolian Steps Slinky Cows.

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'

'So...you claim Farmer Jones kept you locked up naked in a dirty sty, fed nothing but garbage and repetitively called you a filthy swine!'

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Once a big time corporate higher flyer . . . Max was now living the dream on his alpaca farm.

'This is one way to 'round-'em-up!'

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

That's one harmonious butt hole!

A cow's bedside table.

'So I guess it's New Year!'

"You'll have to excuse them. They're the laughing stock of the farm."

'Serves me right for frowning.'