Country Humor Connoisseur Pillows

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"Westminster's over, Shep-it's all about possums now."

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

Dear Farmer Brown - we really don't like you. The Animals.

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

Early American Think tank

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

Nice six-pack!

'Got any cud flavour?'

Cow cleaning his teeth with string.

That's one harmonious butt hole!

'Serves me right for frowning.'

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

A cow's bedside table.

Musical Cows