Country Humor Pillows

Bless you!

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

Early American Think tank

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

Nice six-pack!

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

'Serves me right for frowning.'

'Got any cud flavour?'

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

That's one harmonious butt hole!

A cow's bedside table.

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

'It's got all the original features.'

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!