Couch Commanders T-Shirts

'Because you told me to run the house like a business.'

"It's his own unique version of working remotely!"

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

TV-Man

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

'John is watching the game under protest.'

Captive Audience at the World Cup.

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

'Very well, I'll introduce you. Ego, meet ID. Now get back to work.'

'Don't look at me!'

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'He's in training for the marathon, he watches it every year.'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

"What time is it?" "Half past World Cup."

Randolph maintains a stiff upper lip while the rest of him just goes to hell.

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."

"There's got to be an easier way to lie around the house."

'Having him declawed was a total was a total waste of money.'

"Shouldn't you boys be out fighting crime somewhere?" "Yeah, yeah, whatever." "I could use another beer while you're up." "I ain't goin' on no airplane!" "Anyone pay the cable bill?" The A-Hole Team

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

'Well, at least there's no chance of you suffering from repetative strain injury.'

"The point of going outside is the feeling when coming back inside."

'Next on News 7...GM offers to bail out the government in the event of a shutdown...'