Cost-savvy Traveler Gifts

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

'He must be going economy!'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

Cheapskate Cruises

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

World's cheapest car

Expensive greeting cards.

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

Airline Mergers.

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

Europe on $5000 a day.

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

Basic economy

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'