Cost-savvy Traveler Pillows

'Granted, the burros are a lot slower than chair lifts. But for a quarter the price of a regular lift ticket, I'm all for it.'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

'He must be going economy!'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

Cheapskate Cruises

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

World's cheapest car

Expensive greeting cards.

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

Airline Mergers.

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

Basic economy

Fiji. London. Africa. Travel co. They say you can't take it with you --- but you can't go anywhere without it either.

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.