Budget-conscious Traveller Gifts

Fuel Costs

"£300 A NIGHT?!? - How much is it just for a day..?"

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

'He must be going economy!'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

Expensive greeting cards.

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

World's cheapest car

Airline Mergers.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

Travel Agency. We can afford far, and we can afford wide, but we can't afford both.

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

Europe on $5000 a day.

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.