Cosmetics Salesperson Gifts

"Yes, it was tested on rabbits and they simply adored it."

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

"Too much concealer?"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

'Have you no common scents?!'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"I don't like your application."

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

A new you. 'First, you've got to stop lying about you age.' It didn't start off well.

Hairy men taking advantage of the laser tag/laser hair removal combo package.

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

Have you got your make up on yet?

'Maybe I should get a shopping cart.'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"Hair spray"

Pheromones.

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"More concealer?"

'Now that you've all had a chance to try the shampoo we would like you to fill in this questionnaire.'

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."