Cosmetic Quackers T-Shirts

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

Inflatable Duck Boat

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

"Hair spray"

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

'If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it' actually a gene-modified flounder.'

Fred questions whether Dr. McWit's Quick Draw Stress Tests are AMA approved.

'Well you certainly walk like a duck and quack like a duck.'

'What do you think? Edible nail polish.'

'OK, now I'm freaked out. How'd he get my cell phone number?'

'Tell me. How many acupuncture treatments did doctor Wing give you?'

'BOTOX...QUICK!

"I haven't slept well since you pointed out that these modeling sessions are a form of betrayal."

'While you're operating on me, how about throwing in some free liposuction?'

'As you may know, I'll retire in a few weeks but you better not think that I'm a lame duck now!'

Ed's 1 second acupuncture treatment (man holding porcupine).

'i thought I'd held him get rid of his chronic depression . . .'

Spray on Freckles.

Dead ducks

Garra Fish Pedicure.

Duck protest march

Doctor to nurse about duck: 'Walks like a duck, looks like a duck, but I need some more quacking tests first.'

'Yes, I can give you lipo-suction and a face-lift, Mrs Gribbs, but I must warn you that it won't change the fact that basically, way deep down and underneath it all, you're really a duck.'

Geese

'And when you're flying South...avoid Peking.'