Cosmetic Humor Aficionado Gifts

'BOTOX...QUICK!

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"I don't like your application."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

"She won't be long, I'm just putting her face on."

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'

"She's had a lot of work done."

"Now, open your cosmetics fridge and delicately apply the cold hard cash to the area around your eyes."

'Will your wrinkle cream work on these trousers, Mavis?'

"I'm saying we lash out for the 'Deluxe' collagen treatment, next time, honey."

"Breast implants, filler and botox for your missus doesn't fulfill our home improvements criteria."

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

"You know Gladys, you seem to be getting younger by the minute. What's your secret?" "I finally decided to get a few injections of bootox. It works wonders!"

"Does this shirt make me look gay?"

"I have the smokey eyes look. Can the doctor still give me an eye exam?"

Cut out and keep your own Make up Artist.

'That new concealer works great!'

How people who have plastic surgery see themselves...

Eventually, a point is reached where even the best cosmetic surgery begins to look more like taxidermy gone horribly wrong.

'Wax Lipped Cow'.

'Maybe a tad too much eye makeup.'

"Oh ... still putting on your makeup?"

"Well, this anti-aging cream clearly states it removes crow's feet."

'Silicone implant ward.'

'Hop up on the table and I'll have those wrinkles gone before you know it.'

Gladstone undergoing beautifying process

"I get my looks from my father...he's a plastic surgeon."

"Trust me, she's had work done."

'She's definitely had work done.'

"No, Liz— they didn’t take your Chantecaille Nano Gold Energizing Cream!"

Botox secretary.