Cosmetic Comedy Lovers Gifts

"You know Gladys, you seem to be getting younger by the minute. What's your secret?" "I finally decided to get a few injections of bootox. It works wonders!"

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Bond James, Bond."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

Showbiz Awards

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Children's Parties

Director/Action Man toy.

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

Life is for the birds.

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

The first car accident.

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

Painting by the numbers for adults