Cosmetic Enhancements Gifts

'The effects of aging are inevitable. Either accept it, or inject it.'

"Do you ever regret having breast implants when you were younger?"

Before and after pictures of Dorian Gray in cosmetic surgery.

Say hello to Myrna Dinsdale. Myrna finally had one face-lift too many.

"When I actually was this age, I didn't have much facial expression anyway."

"So you went ahead with the facelift?"

Rhonda was over the moon with the results of her first-ever face-lift.

'Well, what seems to be the problem?'

Medical Silicon Paste.

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

". . . If you're happy and you know it, well your face sure won't show it, if you're happy and you know it clap your hands."

"Like my dazzling smile? My teeth are capped with LEDs."

"Breast implants, filler and botox for your missus doesn't fulfill our home improvements criteria."

"If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be?" "I’d totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body." "That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000." "Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he’s concerned about his mortality. Your answer should have been 'nothing.'" "The alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy." "I think I’d rather wait for the 7000–S." "Stop it."

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

Facelift Book.

"Here they come: Detox and Botox."

'I know we're all terrified of malpractice suits, Bob, but as plastic surgeons, I think we can do a little more than just 'style his hair and call it a day.''hair

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"

"She's had a lot of work done."

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

How to Polish Up Your Resume. Remember, you don't want to polish it to the point you can actually see yourself in it.

Rabbit has cosmetically enhanced teeth: 'I always said that when I could afford to I'd get them fixed.'

'Take ten years off the top.'

"My secretary just made me aware of the necessity of investing in the beauty industry."

'Doctor, I asked for BOTOX injections, not BUTTOCKS injections.'

"Stock photo, right?"

"I told you she'd had some work done."

"You know Gladys, you seem to be getting younger by the minute. What's your secret?" "I finally decided to get a few injections of bootox. It works wonders!"

HOLLYPLASTIC

"I need a Botox job."

"Supersize me."

"The gentleman opposite would like to buy you more time."

'You are my best work.'

'Botox is one thing, but that's the last time I go to a liposuction party!'