Corporate Work Gifts

"Some of the poor wretches eventually become unable to leave the safety of their cubicles."

'Sales figures don't lie. Stevens, hand over the big, foam, number one hand to Toelson.'

"I suggest we take lunch before I read the rest of it."

"The law is a jealous mistress, something wives just have to understand."

"Ever get the feeling you've crunched the same numbers in a previous corporation?"

'Did you get the promotion?'

'You're too big to fail and be fired, but too small to move up to the job you'd like'

Distractions: Work Disputes

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

'Do you, Mary, marine biologist... take Peter, BP oil executive ---'

'Don't we have anyone who took business administration?'

Business cartoon about an incentive to complete the paperwork.

"Yes, you do go the extra mile for this company. But you've been going in the wrong direction."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"This position has become very important to the company."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

'Let's not go by the book.'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Killer Executive Suits.

'That's our mission statement.'

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."