Corporate Linebacker Gifts

'It's all right, I'm just a little behind.'

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

'He had a meteoric rise to the top.'

Office slaves.

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

"It's Swamp & Swallow - they're making an offer we can't refuse!"

National Boss Monument.

'...we have every new employee spend time on our assembly line. Eight hours, no breaks.'

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

Stresses Can Have a Motivating Effect...If They Don't Kill You!

"The boss is charging. I knew you shouldn't have worn that red tie."

'Something tells me this is going to be a long meeting.'

"Sir, the staff are all assembled for your pep talk."

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

'I'm telling ya, it's a jungle out there.'

"What's on my schedule today, Fred?"

"I may be incompetent. But, if you fire me there'll be no one who knows less about this company than you."

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

'The secret to my success? Even as a kid, I never accepted that annoying phrase, 'None of your business.''

Responsibility and duties

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

High Noon at the O.K. Staff Meeting

'I feel confident about our presentation. If there is any blowback, don't worry. We're both wearing our flak jackets under our suits.'

'We got you a bigger desk. With all the work we'll be dumping on you, you'll be needing it.'

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

"I think your idea of stress relief is drastic!"

"Okay. . . so what's the bad news?"

Thanks to therapy, Bob no longer felt like a nobody. He felt like an anybody.

"He's plotting losses."