Corporate Culture Navigator T-Shirts

"I'm as surprised as you are. I had no idea that the sweetheart deal would include an actual sweetheart."

"I'm in a good mood, Chandy, you can take the rest of the day off."

'I like to use the Law as a jumping off point.'

"Help me! My head stayed awake through the meeting, but my entire body fell asleep."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

'Pssst! Straighten up, here come the bigwigs.'

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'No matter how cynical I become, I can't keep up.'

"Uh-Oh..."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'Not only does he suffer from anxiety, he makes everyone else suffer from it too.'

"I'll put your application on file, Mr. Brandt, but I'm quite happy with my current paperweight."

Well, everything's going great! I guess it's time to bring in the naysayers.

'I blame the nothing for something culture.'

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

"How have you managed to keep your job?"

'Comments? Thoughts? Anyone?'

'I like people.. but not a whole lot.'

"You realize, of course, that I'll have to make a big show of having security escort you out."

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'Another nice thing about working here, they tend to promote from within.'

The token incompetent: "Hey - don't ask me."

"They grow up so fast."

'It's either the worst idea to attract new clients I've ever seen, or the best...'

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

'Mr. Donovan, is it all right if I tie my shoelace?'

'I've run your letter through the word processor several times, sir, but it just keeps getting worse.'

Yin and Yang VPs.

"You're just buying time, Peterson! I want those figures on my desk by tomorrow!"

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."