Company Culture Explorer T-Shirts

'No need to call me Mr. Bigge, T. M. We're all on a first and second initial basis around here.'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

The Evolution of the Bonus

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'Hi - I'm your company perk !'

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

'Nice power tie, J.B.'

"You realize, of course, that I'll have to make a big show of having security escort you out."

The token incompetent: "Hey - don't ask me."

How it feels to be in a company with poor communication.

"You're just buying time, Peterson! I want those figures on my desk by tomorrow!"

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

"I have a recurring nightmare where the paradigm keeps shifting without me."

Employer of the month...and every month.

"Hi Sean, welcome to my open space. Take a stand and let's talk."

'And my board approved this?'

"The new boss might seem severe, but he won't bite your head off!"

"I hate my job and I'm terrified of losing it."

"It's all about teamwork. We even have our own mascot."

'What the hell is a win-win situation?'

'Welcome to the Business Ethics course. Today we're going to start with the basics.'

"Remember to look miserable when you meet the workforce son. We've spent years convincing them that money can't buy happiness."

"Let's demonstrate our corporate values of diversity and inclusion and listen to some of Brian's stupid ideas."

'I like to use the Law as a jumping off point.'

'We don't need an R & D department anymore; we've got something better - Steve Jobs' garbage pail.'

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

'Does that mean you found a new job, Hirshenson?'

'Fortunately, Henderson's no fool - He's a damn'd fool.'

Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?