Corporate Communications Connoisseur Gifts

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

The MBA Draft

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

Dialogue

Men's business romper.

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."

'Well, your guess is as good as mine. Almost.'

"I appreciate your vision and work ethic but I have a budget. How much would it cost for your vision without work ethics?"

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

Harvey went to the kitchen to top up his gin and tonic. When he came back, things took an unexpected turn.

I'd like to talk about absenteeism.

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."