Cooking Clairvoyant T-Shirts

"The fact that you forecast the winner of the TV cooking contest does NOT make you a chef!"

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

Flying sauces.

The Origins of Everything

"The bagels are better in New York."

Pie Filling Reader

'How wonderful - the both of us in futures.'

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

"I'm starving! How long will dinner be?"

'Before you order, perhaps you'd like to discuss your food issues with our eating therapist.'

'Nobody does curses like Gordon Ramsay.'

Psychic car mechanics.

I mean, do I set the oven at 400'? 450'? How long do I keep them in? Do I turn them halfway through cooking? Oh, if only children came with instructions.

Big Medium

"Are you sure its supposed to look like that?"

'Waiter, there's going to be a fly in my soup!'

Madame Zola - Bitcoin futures

"And now, with the projected sales figures..."

"You don't use a cookbook, Tia Carmen?"

'How will my turkey turn out his year?'

"Well, make up your mind! Does it suck or is it cool?"

'The mist is clearing.'

"I'm sorry it's not what you ordered, but the chef works in mysterious ways."

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'

"I'm looking for a book on ESP..." "I know..."

Madame Irma: sait tout, voit tout. Lit l'avenir dans le big data.

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that,'

"Remember, never put all your eggs into one omelet."

Psychedelia Smith Cook Book.

"Mmmm... Let's see... Little cable cars...ah...ah...halfway to the...to the...aha! To the stars! ...I Left My Heart in San Francisco! Tony Bennett! Right?"

'Which one do you want to read?'

'Yes, but the carrots are still hard.'

Flying Sauces

Gastrodamus.

"I always have chicken so I can study the entrails."