Conviction Enthusiasts Gifts

"I was destined to become a martyr…I've always had that fire in my belly."

Trial by Media

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

True confessions.

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Wal-Mart Ruling

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

First Prize!

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'And do you promise to be the one out of two marriages that does not end in divorce.'

Conspiracy Cat

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

World Financial Mafia

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

"I have been happily married... three times!"

'Someday I'm going to tell you all of the things I've done right.'

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

National Liberty and Tax Codes.

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

"'Better or worse' and 'richer or poorer' are NOT choices."

"Please, Daddy, just one more conspiracy theory."