Conversion Convert Pillows

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

Pharaoh Cocoon

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

"You've changed."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"Wings will be cool, I guess, but I'm mostly hoping the braces and pimples fall off."

'Somebody should tell our office manager that a motorized filing cabinet does not qualify as an electronic health record system.'

You will always find a spot to garden

"After seventeen years underground, I'm gonna buzz my ass off."

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

Mine says, 'Blaming China won't work.'

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

"I prefer your early pieces."

Yeah, I'm on metamorphosis leave tomorrow: I can't wait!'

"Ed is back from his silent cocoon retreat."

I only weigh 95 kilograms...That's 210...in pounds!

'I may be a lump of coal now, but someday I'll be a diamond."

New Electric Car

'I am reluctant to offer plastic surgery at this time, Miss Caterpillar: Why don't you let Nature take its course?'

"I don't know...but somehow you've changed, Harold!"

'But Miss, I've only just got the hang of 'the little hand' and 'the big hand'...'

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

'Good grief, Martha...surely I can slump into a little grouchiness occasionally.'

"It doesn't matter how many people tell me I'm beautiful. Inside, I still feel like the fat caterpillar all the other kids teased unmercifully!"

"Tell me this is just your mid-life crisis."

"No, thanks Bob. And just exactly when did you decide you were a 'dog person'?"