Conversion Pillows

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

'You might want to let that one go...'

A religious discussion

'It was a bit of a culture shock for my parents too - they're Jewish.'

"When did you decide to start going to church?"

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

"Do you really believe, Gerald?"

"Now that's what I call an offer you can't refuse!"

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

"Agnes when did you go all religious?"

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

Pharaoh Cocoon

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"You've changed."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

'I won't be coming to church any more, Reverend -- I've decided to convert to golf.'

"Wings will be cool, I guess, but I'm mostly hoping the braces and pimples fall off."

'Yes, death signifies a cosmic change of address. Alas, your husband's mail will not be forwarded.'

You will always find a spot to garden

"After seventeen years underground, I'm gonna buzz my ass off."

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

"That's O.K., Dad. I think I'll do with the ambient waterfall sounds tonight."

"I prefer your early pieces."

Yeah, I'm on metamorphosis leave tomorrow: I can't wait!'

Je-Hereford's Witnesses

"Ed is back from his silent cocoon retreat."

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

Yahweh/Your Way

'I may be a lump of coal now, but someday I'll be a diamond."

"Tell me this is just your mid-life crisis."

"No, thanks Bob. And just exactly when did you decide you were a 'dog person'?"