Conversion Calculator Gifts

What are the chances?

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

"Have you been working out?"

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

People, please listen. I'm talkin 'bout the income gap. The top one percent of Americans get one third of the nation's income, over double what they got in 1980. One-third. The income for the top 0.01% is 196 times the bottom 90%. Your wages have stagnated and the super-duper rich have gotten super-duper richer! How can you possibly swallow your coffee? Because you're making me do math before noon!

You will always find a spot to garden

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

Mine says, 'Blaming China won't work.'

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

Business Meeting

Report on radio: 'In the City the pound fell against the dollar, the dollar fell against the euro and finally the whole lot just toppled over,'

I only weigh 95 kilograms...That's 210...in pounds!

School Supply Room. Look at this -- a calculator, a protractor and a compass! You've discovered the missing weapons of math instruction!

"The only spells she does anymore are the Gospels."

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

Economists generally agree that consumers don't trust products that cost too little. If an item is too inexpensive, it seems cheap. A higher cost connotes quality. Price hike! Beware the rabid capitalist bearing economic theory.

'Good grief, Martha...surely I can slump into a little grouchiness occasionally.'

Excess Baggage: Sometimes, your plane ticket is the least expensive part of the trip.

"It's great having all the space, but Dan has been missing the city a bit."

'You might want to let that one go...'

'We strongly recommend you buy the service plan.'

'You have to learn arithmetic in case your computer crashes.'

"Agnes when did you go all religious?"

What's this in Euros?

'Before booking-is it Euros in Bognor?'

People think accountancy is just about numbers, but there is also the fractions, the percentages